Wednesday, December 15, 2010

In which I compare Michiana to Narnia.

My evil twin sent me a text yesterday from the corner of 6 & 31. He had no idea where he was when he referenced that seemingly random landmark, but every fiber of my being screamed home!

He's on a work trip, driving past frozen cornfields on his way to meet with Midwestern strangers (as if there is such a thing). He's bored and cold. 

But yesterday, he woke up in the city where my little brother sleeps and drove down roads I know by heart to have a meeting at a college where one of my oldest friends is finishing up her teaching degree. He stopped at an intersection less than ten miles from a hug from my mother, where she was getting her sister's house ready for a visit from area realtors and needed help moving furniture. He has no idea that Pops, hunched over his desk trying to restore electricity to Marshall County folks who lost power during the weekend's winter storms, might have looked out the window of his office to see his rental car speeding past. In between text messages, he was half a mile and one right turn away from the church where I was baptized and the backyard where my best friend and I used to spend summer nights curled up in her parents' hammock dreaming big dreams and searching for shooting stars. If he happened to glance over his right shoulder at just the right time, he would have noticed the restaurant where I burned my fingertips away delivering eggs to hungry truck drivers and learned the value of an honest tip.

He didn't know that his GPS unit was taking him down the least efficient route to the town where I fell in love for the first time, where my parents fell in love for the last time, and where I've prayed my most sincere prayers, cried my most heartfelt tears, and laughed the way only a teenager can. He didn't even drive past the Walkway of Lights, which will forever remind me of my aunt Lynette and her famously bulky camera.

There is a magical, complicated world of memories hidden beneath those 6-8 inches of lake effect snow, but all he can see are the mile markers between meetings. As I was being off-loaded from my Metro car this morning due to a suspicious package at the Pentagon (seriously people, can you not keep track of your Christmas presents?), this thought made me so homesick I almost teared up. I wished that I could transfer all of my memories to my evil twin so that he could truly appreciate the beauty of where he was, but, unfortunately, that's not how it works.

This specific phenomena is what C.S. Lewis captures so beautifully in his Chronicles of Narnia. Behind the most ordinary objects - a wardrobe in a spare room, an old painting in a weathered frame - Lewis creates a new, mysterious world for his young heroes to explore which enhances (rather than enabling their escape from) their everyday lives.


In fact, this is the world view with which Lewis approaches all of his work. He sees windows to eternity everywhere, especially in his fellow Christians. Behind every pair of eyes is a soul endowed with an eternal purpose, and every waking moment is heavy with the Weight of Glory:
It is in the light of these overwhelming possibilities, it is with the awe and circumspection proper to them, that we should conduct all our dealings with one another, all friendships, all loves, all play, all politics. There are no ordinary people. You have never talked to a mere mortal. Nations, cultures, arts, civilisations--these are mortal, and their life is to ours as the life of a gnat. But it is immortals whom we joke with, work with, marry, snub, and exploit--mortal horrors or everlasting splendours. This does not mean that we are to be perpetually solemn. We must play. But our merriment must be of that kind (and it is, in fact, the merriest kind) which exists between people who have, from the outset, taken each other seriously--no flippancy, no superiority, no presumption. And our charity must be a real and costly love, with deep feeling for the sins in spite of which we love the sinner--no mere tolerance, or indulgence which parodies love as flippancy parodies merriment. Next to the Blessed Sacrament itself, your neighbour is the holiest object presented to your senses. If he is your Christian neighbour, he is holy in almost the same way, for in him also Christ vere latitat--the glorifier and the glorified, Glory Himself, is truly hidden.
This is what my memories do for northern Indiana back roads. This is what Narnia does for the Pevensie children. This is what the weight of glory does for your neighbor.

This is what, on that very first Christmas, Jesus did for mankind.

Monday, December 13, 2010

More Sleep Please.

Today, I'm exhausted. I woke up extra early today for a doctors appointment and now I'm exhausted. I didn't even have coffee until 9:30am. Good thing I didn't try to make coffee this morning because apparently we ran out this weekend. Disaster.

Lately, I've been dreaming about work. This is probably very unhealthy. I do this from time to time and most recently, on Sunday and Wednesday evenings. My dream consisted of my endless list of work assignments. I was dreaming about how I was going to get everything done today. I dreamed up a very nice to do list. This list was organized and well thought out. I was very excited about my to do list...it wasn't messy, it was color coded and typed. Then, my alarm went off around 6:00am. I woke up and realized about 30 seconds into my waking up process, that my list didn't exist. Disappointment at 6am. So..I got ready for the day and tried to forget about the list.

Have I tried to recreate it? No. I gave up because now I'm exhausted.

I've been doing this for a while, dreaming about my work and strategizing how I'm going to accomplish everything. When I was working on Capitol Hill, at one point I handled the housing meltdown. I saw the entire issue crash right before my eyes. It was during those nights I would dream about being behind in my mortgage payments and facing possible foreclosure. Oh wait. That's right. I don't have a mortgage. Why am I freaking out about this in my sleep?

As always, I guess my subconscious is trying to maintain control of my life events and I've got to let God handle. It's even a battle in my sleep.

Well, I hope you got some good sleep today. Guess who's going to bed at around 9:30pm? I can't wait.

ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

Monday, December 6, 2010

Deck the halls.



On Sunday, S & I had the perfect December morning. We started off with cinnamon pancakes, turned on some Christmas music, pulled out the decorations, lit some candles, baked some molasses cookies . . . Watching the white lights twinkle on our tiny tree, I really started to get into the Christmas spirit. It's all about setting the right atmosphere, you know?

And then this happened:
S (screaming at Dave Barnes via my iPod): LIAR!
Me: What's wrong?
S: "He bought a ring?" "Home and kids someday?" I don't believe him.
Me: S, the song is about Mary and Joseph. Like, the Mary and Joseph.
S: Oh. Well, I don't care. I still don't believe him. "Love right from the start?"
Me: Love does exist, you know . . .
Because it's Christmas, I'm willing to admit that perhaps I've been a little too harsh on guys lately. Do I still think that they ought to pay for coffee on the first date? Yes. But it wouldn't hurt me to extend a little bit of the grace that I myself hope to receive. My tone lately has been a little bitter. If, instead, I put the same effort into creating a hopeful atmosphere that I put into my Christmas decorations, maybe our hearts would stay a little warmer this season.

It's always wrong until it's right. And it will eventually be right. In the meantime, enjoy:

Mary was the first of three
Long black hair and sugar sweet
Daddy's eyes and Momma's crooked smile
She was barely seventeen
Got a job keepin dishes clean
Planned to stay in this city for a while
For a while

Joseph ran a lumber yard

About a mile from Olive Park
Quiet boy, he never had much to say
It was love right from the start
He bought a ring and won Mary's heart
Had hopes for a home and kids someday
Kids someday

The angel scared her half to death

She would've screamed but she lost her breath
On a midnight there in the middle of May
He said "Oh mary don't be afraid
You'll bear a son that the Lord has made

Name him Jesus, He'll light the way."


She packed the clothes, he made the plans

They had to go to Bethlehem
But there was nowhere left to stay
So in a barn she gave birth
To the King of Kings the Lord of Earth
Just a little bitty thing sleeping on the hay
Sleeping on the hay

The story's too long to tell

But he walked on water and lived through hell
Killed on a cross and rose from the grave
We got a King they got a son
Mary and Joseph were the only ones
There on that very first Christmas day
There on that very first Christmas day

Thursday, December 2, 2010

RE: The Break-Up Starbucks Saga

Dear S,

Since you asked for thoughts about the recap of your most recent date, here are mine:

You ordered a decaf tall black coffee, which costs about $1.50 before tax. He didn't even pretend to offer to pay for it. Walk away. Don't look back.

At lunch today, my Evil Twin tried to argue that most men have had some kind of shared experience whereby they've been rejected because they put in too much effort up front. They showed too much enthusiasm early on (perhaps by suggesting a really nice dinner or by bringing flowers), and this turned the girl off. So, by aiming for coffee and letting you pick up your half of the tab, it doesn't necessarily mean they're uninterested. They're just trying to ease you into it. These men are strategically investing a little bit of seed money, hoping that it will pay dividends with a real relationship down the road.

The problem with his defense? I've never in all of my twenty-something years met a woman like that.

Here's my take:

The difference between buying someone dinner and meeting up for coffee is the difference between investing a  little bit of seed money and playing the slots.

I understand that every time you signal interest, there's some level of risk involved. Rejection works both ways. I could turn you down, or you may realize midway through dinner that I'm not as charming as you thought. But if you are genuinely interested in me and signal that, either directly (by flat out saying it) or symbolically (by putting in a little bit of effort to plan and execute an actual date), I can promise to reciprocate your honesty.

If you kinda-sorta figure that maybe we could sit close together in a public place for a while until we get bored, don't be surprised when nothing happens. If romance blossoms, that's called getting lucky.

When I went on all of those terrible .com dates last spring, my older brother told me that if a guy didn't pay for my coffee, I should just get up and walk out because he wasn't worth my time. I thought that sounded a little harsh, but in retrospect . . . he was right. I wasted quite a few hours listening to uninteresting men who were not all that interested in me talk about nothing, and then had to invest even more time retrospectively analyzing what went wrong. Why did he not think I was attractive enough to put down $1.50? Should I have worn heels? Or am I just not pretty? Am I not funny? Not flirtatious enough? Not smart? Too smart? Do I seem unkind? On at least one occasion, I had to pick up the entire tab! [side note: How do you know you're on a date with a Democrat? When he suggests you meet up for coffee and offers to pay, but then doesn't have enough cash to cover yours . . . or his own.]


Those dates didn't really have anything to do with me at all. They were arranged by men who had incredibly low expectations and who weren't willing to do more than pull the slot.

You and I are both perfectly capable of paying for our own coffee. But if we do so, I suggest that we get it to go and drink it in the company of people we enjoy.

xoxo,

EDB

Update: The Break-Up Starbucks

Well...

We met at The Break-Up Starbucks. I was reading some work materials when he showed up. I was kind of nervous. I think I talked a lot. You know, the I can't stop talking because I'm nervous and not really sure how to read you and don't really care for awkward silence. So...It was 7:30pm and we left The Break-Up Starbucks at 9:45pm. Thoughts?

Topics of Conversation:
What do you do for fun?
Where are you from?
Where did you go to school?
What do you do at your job? Follow-up: What does that mean?
What is your shoe size? Just kidding!
Do you have any siblings?
Where were you before DC?
Etc.........................................

Gosh, I hope the people sitting next to us couldn't figure out we were on a first-kind-of-sort-of-not-paying-for-my-coffee-date. They probably heard everything.

It wasn't difficult to chat with him. He does laugh a lot. I couldn't figure out why he was laughing so much. Um...yeah. BUT...he didn't buy me my coffee. Whoa. That's big time. Thoughts? Shouldn't 30 year old men know this by now? My Mom has always said, "all men know what to do." True? And, he doesn't drink coffee. But, he invited me to coffee? He ordered a lemonade.

Okay.

We ran into some friends before we exited the building. Talked a little while longer. Then we walked to his car which happened to be parked along my route home. He gave me a ride home. So, I wasn't sure if he was all that interested and I can't stand that awkward last 5 minutes of a date. As I was battling to get my large purse and backpack (I have my heavy laptop in it) out of the car, and I was in a dress, he asks if it would be okay to call me when he returns from his mission trip. My response:

"Yeah, that would be fun!"

Really, Sarith? Fun? So he's supposed to call when he returns to the United States of America. We'll see...

Will this be another The Break-Up Starbucks candidate or will he survive? To be continued.

The End.

Wednesday, December 1, 2010

We're Going to Need Some "& Guests"

The future Mrs. Johnston with her fiancé, Sky
WASHINGTONHearts broke in multiple hemispheres last week when Sky Johnston, Southern Baptist Theological Seminary '12, dropped down on one knee and asked southern belle Virginia Keen Wing, SBTS '10, to be his bride. Though she was momentarily too surprised to make any audible sound, Wing recovered with an enthusiastic "Yes!"

"I liked it, so I put a ring on it," said Johnston.

Wing is a 5th grade instructor at the Ambrose School in Boise, Idaho, and is known to be extremely excitable during the Christmas season. She enjoys the holiday so much that she has been rumored to play Christmas music for her students in the classroom as early as September. With an early present sparkling on her left hand and a promise in her heart, Wing will have more than jingle bells to celebrate this year. Break out the mistletoe, kids, it's going to be a party!

"I didn't believe that any men like him existed . . . but here he is!" gushed Wing.

Sources close to the bride-to-be knew that Johnston had distinguished himself from Wing's former suitors when they began receiving text messages over the summer likening the pair's budding relationship to mountain biking downhill at top speed without brakes. Though there's always a significant element of mystery and providence involved in matters of the heart, it was clear early on that the life Johnston was inviting Wing to join was an adventure she wouldn't be able to resist.

the evidence
At least two female friends of the bride will need male companions to serve as "& guests" at the June ceremony in Louisville. To apply, please leave a note with your contact information in the comment section. Prospective suitors will be required to submit pictures of themselves in a tie and suit jacket and must provide a list of references.